today is a hard day. I am trying to be kind to myself, but it’s hard to see a good reason why. They say things get harder before they get easier, but I wonder how long we need to hold on. What will come first, the turning point or the breaking point? And still, we persevere, if only out of habit. Maybe someday I’ll look back on today with a sad smile on my face, not knowing how things would eventually turn out.

will I be smiling because things turned out so much better than I expected, or because I didn’t realize how good I had it today and how much worse everything would get?

Today, I can’t tell.

I miss you, like always. I can’t talk to you, like always. I love you, like always.

-D